Throwback

xoxo,

~Michlyn

Blessed. {3 years}

When I wrote this post...I was a little nervous. I had never written about our adoption and it's crazy journey on my blog before. I didn't know what the responses would be like, but I knew I had to do it.

You guys are amazing! So many prayers were lifted up to our Savior and we could feel them! I actually have gotten asked a few times since, how my little sister is doing. And I'm here to give you an update.

As the big sister in an adoption, you're looked up to. She wants to dress like me, do the same stuff as me, and talk like me. (including other big sister Erin) But that can be hard, because even though you can sometimes see sweet and innocent sides of her, you know it's much deeper. Her survival skills that will kick in just so she can impress you or get you to like her.

Adoption is hard if you don't see all sides. You have to understand that these amazing children were abandoned. Some how...some way. They are not with their first family. And genetically, emotionally, physically, and mentally...there is always going to be something that ties them back to that. So whether it's a hard process or not to work through that, it's still there.

Our adoption was considered an "older child adoption". My sister was around 4 yrs old when we brought her home. So we see a lot more of the grief, hurt, and distrust that she feels. After she learned english perfectly...it was the words mostly. Gross words of hate and abandonment came out of her mouth. Tantrums and screaming because she's so unsure of the future. She has this undying need to be in control of everything she does. But part of that trust, is us teaching her that we have everything under control & she has to learn to be a kid again.

We have seen some improvement since I wrote that post 2 months ago. My mom has needed to literally hold her and tell my sister to listen to her. (in a way that helps bonding and will let her know that my mom is the parent...not her) And that can be frustrating and takes a lot of energy for a surprisingly strong 7 yr old. But my mom hasn't had to hold her in a while. She can just calmly explain that my sister needs to change her attitude or she'll need to take a break in her room. The words haven't stopped yet, but that is a control thing that comes when her anxiety is at an all time high. 

We're holding onto a hope that takes us one step at a time. Whether she'll keep improving, or we'll take a couple steps back...it's all apart of the journey. And guess what guys! IT'S BEEN 3 YRS (last week) SINCE MY SISTER CAME HOME. 3 WHOLE YEARS! 

Our God chose us for this journey, and I'm holding onto the hope He gave us...that the best is yet to come. Keep your prayers coming...we feel them, and we're so blessed to have people like you that support us & don't judge us on this road of life.

xoxo,

~Michlyn

Adoption: Behind the Scenes

Most of you know that I have an adopted sister. She is 7yrs old, she was born in Ethiopia, Africa, and has now been home for about 3 years.

The first thing people see is a beautiful, spunky, & innocent little girl that is part of our family. If meeting someone for the first time, they ask her a lot of questions and just say how cute she is. The thing is...they don't know.

They don't know how hard our daily life can actually be.
They don't know how much trauma and hurt she's gone through.
They don't know how different everything was before.


Adoption is a miracle. It brings kids home from all over the world. And everyone who brings a child(ren) home always have different situations. Some are good, some are not so great, and others are rough.

Ours has been rough. Because behind that little girl with crazy curly hair, and a smile that could trick even the wisest person...Is a daughter of our King who is broken. Completely and utterly shattered into thousands of pieces.

The pieces of trust, love, connection, joy, security, and hope are missing. They were missing before we even laid our eyes on that very first picture of her.

And as I see the tantrums, tears, and hurt through her...I see more than just my broken sister. I see how she sees herself. I see how she thinks she should be treated. It's the hardest thing I've experienced.

Mostly I just want to cry at the hardship of it all and sometimes I want to laugh at the craziness God put into our lives.

The patience my parents have. The wisdom of therapists, friends, & prayer warriors. The protection and grace of our Savior.

It's all just a gigantic huge mess. Sometimes a bad mess. Sometimes a good mess.

When people don't understand our situation and chat and smile with my sister. I just want to scream. Because she barely does that with us. We should be the ones giving her the love, patience, and lessons of life and get a smile. But that's rare. And I just want to tell that person how they don't understand. How incredibly hard we try to make progress and teach her every. single. day.

1 yr. 2 yrs. 3 yrs.... Those walls around her heart have been falling a lot slower than we ever expected. Everything isn't hard of course. She's grown so much and learned quite a bit. But when survival kicks in from past memories or something triggers...we start sliding down instead of climbing up. And each step is going to be work & worth it.

This is exactly how we live without pretending. We show her the best we can and hope & pray that things will get better. I don't know who will truly understand this, but I hope it makes you think a little differently if anything at all.

I just needed to say this. And Jesus is faithful.

~Michlyn

Insta-Week / Day 2

It's National Adoption Day! I am so thankful for my little sister.

No matter how much she can drive me crazy - I still love her.

Our world has been turned upside down for this little girl, as her broken heart continues to heal.

I am also thankful for Caribou Coffee and all the love they spread around.

To help families like us... who can't always raise all the money they need for adoption.

God is good. And I am blessed.

~Michlyn

Random | Taking a Break

I know I've been quiet and thought that I'd stop by quickly.

A couple day ago I wrote another post for my series "Going Back in Black & White".

Other than that, I haven't posted much in the last 2 weeks.

So I'll just give you a quick random post, and then it's time for me to take a break from the blogging world.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

School has been keeping me especially busy - With writing & math final projects, archery gym classes, GRAD testing, and a whole secondary softball game coming up. I still need to order a yearbook and finish some other things up this weekend. Whew! Can't wait until this next week is over...

My family is doing great! Easter was very good, and we loved celebrating the resurrection of our KING! Although I will update you with another family picture soon, this one didn't work out too well. The sun was not being our friend that day. :)

Notice the squinty eyes... 

Youth group is going good, and most of us were able to volunteer at the Easter breakfast this past weekend. We're also busy fundraising for upcoming events and conferences this summer. Can't wait to do a post on that soon.

Well there you have a post about my life in a nutshell. I might be back in a week, and I might be back in a month. This is the first blogging break that I've actually ever taken, so we'll see how it goes.

Talk to you all soon!
~Michlyn

Going Back in Black & White

Going Back in Black and White

Today I'm doing my sister Tareh Jo. She was born in the beautiful country of Ethiopia, and we brought her home in July 2010.

It's been a wild ride since bringing her home, but worth every minute. Some days are worse than others, and other days they're even worse.

Coming from a scary, crazy, and unforgettable background is not easy. Some things will never be erased from her memory, and we can't help that. We don't want to her to forget where she came from, or who she is. We're doing our best to teach her how to be in a family.

She has been home for almost 21 months, and she's already learned so much. She's grown over 6 inches, lost about 5 teeth, knows her ABC's and most numbers, and the list goes on. 

We can't imagine our lives with out her, and we love her so much! God surprises us everyday with the adventures He takes us on!

April 2010 - April 2012

Referral Picture/Easter Picture

~Michlyn

I Wish...

Sometimes...

I wish teachers wouldn't give out so much homework

I wish my mom didn't get hurt while she tries to be the best momma she can be

I wish my siblings weren't so mean or disrespectful

I wish I could please the Lord in a better way and more often

I wish my attitude was always good

I wish that making hard decisions wasn't so...well...hard

I wish the truth in some situations wasn't so hard to say

I wish that the house was always clean

I wish my makeup, hair, and face was always spotless and perfect

I wish that I didn't get so jealous over ridiculous things

I wish my dad had a better boss and a higher paycheck

I wish that money didn't get in the way of so much stuff

I wish that hearts could never be broken

I wish that there weren't orphans in this world

I wish friends wouldn't lie and make things so complicated

I wish politicians could make decisions that help everyone

I wish athletes didn't have to get hurt and ruin their dreams

I wish that no one got sick and would stay healthy

I wish that I could take amazing pictures

I wish... I wish... I wish...

BUT

I know... That our God performs miracles and that some of the things above could eventually be fixed.

Nothing is impossible with God!
~Michlyn

HOPE.

Hope is very strong.

You have to believe. Feel strongly about something. That's what hope is.
My littlest sister's middle name is Hope. We brought her home from Ethiopia through the miracle of adoption.

Adoption takes hope. Not just hope, but much more. Such as...

Faith
Prayer
Support
Financial help
Srength
Patience
and even more than that...

Everybody needs it.

~Michlyn